Metropolitan Center for Psychological Services

It might seem improbable to be able to find your perfect partner in your near future. But if you’re willing to keep an open mind, finding your special someone can be easier than you think.


Implement these strategies to find your special someone:


  1. Think about what you truly want. A great first step is to take a piece of paper and write, “My Perfect Partner” at the top.


    • Now think back and remember every person you’ve ever met of the appropriate gender and make a list of every specific quality you’ve ever been attracted to.


    • The people that come to mind might not even be those you particularly liked, but maybe you were entranced by their sense of humor. Maybe it was someone else’s parenting skills.
    • Simply list the best qualities of all those you’ve ever met. You’ll likely end up with a list of 25-40 items.


    • Make a list that really inspires and excites you. The more desirable the list, the more likely you are to hang in there until you’re successful.
  1. Set a goal. It’s extremely difficult to accomplish anything worthwhile without a goal. Your goal should read similarly to this: “On or before (target date), I will have found my perfectpartner and entered into a relationship with him.”

  1. Reinforce your goal every day.You must reinforce your goal on a daily basis to maintain the priority. Use these 2 processes:


  • Read your goal and your list of attributes aloud every morning and night.
  • Imagine an end-point success image: approximately half a page describing the experience of having just achieved your goal. Record what you see, think, hear, smell, and feel. This image should be highly desirable to you. Do this every day.


  1. Keep an open mind. By reinforcing your goal each day, you brain will start to present subtle suggestions to you.


  • If you’re suddenly thinking about joining an online dating site or signing up for salsa lessons, go for it!


  • If you don’t follow any of the suggestions from your subconscious, it’s likely to stop giving suggestions.
  1. Hold up your end. If you desire a woman or man that’s in fantastic shape and very stylish, consider your own situation. It might be easier to attract such a woman or man if you weren’t 75 pounds overweight and sporting a $7 haircut. Work on developing whatever qualities will help you to attract the type of person you desire.


  • When you leave the house, ask yourself if you’re dressed appropriately for running into your perfect partner. Always be prepared!


  1. Meet people. It’s very difficult to find your perfect partner if you’re not spending time with those who could be your perfect partner. Get out there and socialize!


Meeting your perfect partner in your near future is entirely reasonable if you make it a priority in your life. Make a list of attributes you want to see in your special someone. Then set a goal and prioritize it each day. You’ll likely be surprised by the results.

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